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Monday, 14 May 2012

  • Departure


    I've anticipated this moment for over half a year, looked forward to this day from the moment everything fell apart. It was my planned escape from everything bad that ever happened this unfortunate year. It was my strength to keep moving on, and my way out of this place that traps bad memories and gruesome feelings.

    It's the feeling of being set free from your constraints, even those that you set yourself in. To know I'm leaving it all behind for new destinations, it's a metaphor for my departure from the past.

    I'm not sure all the reasons behind each person's grad trips. Some see it as a celebration, others see it as a way to see more before starting work. I see mine as a mixture of everything, but the feeling of moving on is overwhelming.

    This is for me, entirely for me. This is me leaving behind what I clung onto for so many years: a ceremonial goodbye in style.

    See you all on the flip side :)

Monday, 07 May 2012

  • Love

    Some say couples break up because there comes a point in a relationship when love just isn't enough to overcome the differences. No, that's not it. Love is always enough to overcome the differences. There just isn't enough love left to fulfill our changing expectations for one another. There just isn't enough love to make the fight worth it anymore.

    I still think love is enough to overcome all boundaries and transcend all odds because love is a wonderful thing and a wonderful force. I'll find it again someday.

Friday, 27 April 2012

  • Switzerland

    Switzerland. It's what he likes to call me.

    It's because I like to keep the peace. I always try to see both sides of the story and stay relatively neutral. It's not a self-conscious thing. Rather, I just really thrive on a happy atmosphere, and I try to ensure people around me are happy so that I'm happy too. Anyone who knows me well is aware of my opinions and my slight boisterousness, but to the general outsider, I just become a generally likeable person.

    I sometimes don't want to be liked simply because I'm Switzerland. I'm happy to play Switzerland, but sometimes, I want to be liked even if I were Germany.

    Maybe this just translates to me wishing someone would love me for everything that I am, flaws and all.

Sunday, 08 April 2012

  • On Paying for Dates

    A typical date: guy asks girl to dinner, girl offers to pay half, guy refuses and foots the bill. But what happens when your date doesn't only consist of dinner, but of drinks or movies or other things before and after?

    My one qualm with this type of interaction is that it's so unnecessary: the banter and discussions that precede each transaction. I know it's just courtesy, but I find it so mundane, especially when I have to repeatedly offer after each and every activity, knowing full well his answer:

    "Hey it's really okay, I got the froyo."
    "No, I told you, I want to spoil you and take you out on a really great date, so just let me take care of everything."

    Now what? Do I keep offering?

    There was one date where I just got so annoyed after offering for the few rounds of drinks we got at the bar that I didn't even bother to offer after dinner. In retrospect, I feel a little bad about it, but there just comes a point when you know they won't take your money and my asking just becomes a routine rejection.

    Should girls ever stop offering to pay their half?

Friday, 06 April 2012

  • Not That Fearless

    I appreciate that he's approaching this slowly, and I find it easier to handle as well. I wish I could say I'm living up to everything I wrote about a few months back -- about living with my heart on my sleeve and being completely fearless -- but I can't. It's easier said than done. There's an inherent fear in me now with trusting someone else with my heart.

    I'm playing a game of tag, and he's "it."

suuperstar

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    • Name: Ada
    • Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 1/30/2006

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